And on this hearts and roses day, I'm still irritated with my husband over something that happened yesterday. And since his work schedule recently changed, I don't see him in the mornings anymore, so we haven't even spoken today.
I have a card at home that I still need to write in and I don't feel like it right now.
This is just brutal honesty about my own shortcomings, failures, selfishness, stubbornness, and pride. I'm sitting here thinking and pondering on love and marriage and real everyday life.
We're told all the time how hard marriage is (and seriously, it is). But it's hard because people are hard. We are all sinners and selfish and imperfect and then we say "I do, forever and always" to another selfish and imperfect sinner and move in together. (I should add that I'm chuckling to myself and shaking my head as I type this.)
There are so many beautiful moments and fun days and more love and forgiveness than I've ever experienced.
And there are also fights and tears and yelling and silence and disagreements and messy moments.
But here's the deal: he's far from perfect and I'm far from perfect. So of freaking course we're going to get irritated with one another.
The goal and the challenge lies in what we do with that irritation. Do we let it fester and grow and blow out of proportion? Do we go to bed angry?
Or, do we seek forgiveness and reconciliation, admit our wrong, explain what we're feeling and why we reacted that way, give a smooch, and move on?
We have both responses in our home. I'm incredibly grateful to say that the latter is more of the norm (praise Jesus). But we/I definitely need to work on making it even more of the norm. My hubby is better at it than I am, for sure, and it often humbles and convicts me.
P.S. My hubby just called me quick in the middle of his work day to ask me to be his valentine (and ask if I'm still mad). I love that man.